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  • Writer's pictureLisa L. Dalton

How Do You Know When He's Right for You?

How do you know he's right for you? When Value and the Soul Meets.

The Wisdom of Sundays by Oprah Winfrey has become apart of my morning meditation reading. If you follow me on social media, you should know that I am a huge fan of "Super Soul Sundays".. yes I read more than the Bible... This composition of some of Oprah's most powerful spiritual aha moments has really helped me further my spiritual journey. In her GPS chapter, she shares a lesson from Author and spiritual leader, Caroline Myss. I quote - "So how do you know when its right for you? When do you know he's the right one for you? When that's the right job for you? - When you're not put in a position to betray yourself. You don't betray yourself anymore. You're not put in a position where you feel like you have to negotiate your sense of integrity, which is an act of betrayal. (to yourself). You don't feel like you have to compromise who you are. When you have enough respect for yourself to say something. (Value yourself). You don't feel like you're being drained. This isn't costing me my psyche. This isn't costing me, my soul. I don't feel confused on some deep level. I'm not drained. I can be tired after a days work, but I'm not psychically drained where I feel like I'm losing life." Carolina Myss. I'm not sure how you feel about the words from Carolina Myss, but for me, it was a true aha moment! This is a lesson I believe we all could learn from. You see I was that girl earlier in my journey. I wanted to be with the one who had all the money, who could help me raise my baby, financially that is. He would be the one who would pay all my bills, pay for my son to go to college and all my troubles would be over. Only to find out, I was becoming someone who I didn't like and NOPE he didn't pay for my son to go to college and nor did he pay all MY bills. Only the bills he created. And now with the job... yell the job would be the answer to all my financial and professional needs and desires. Unbeknownst to me, there would be a system in place that would try to block me from moving up and receiving raises. It would make me question my ability to do the job and have me crying during my lunch breaks because I hated it so much. What was the straw that broke the camels back in each of the above stories? It was me realizing that I deserved the right to be loved the way God intended and my talents and gifts were not for sale at the price of my sanity. Now, I can truly say that I am in love with someone who loves me in-spite my past. Who loves me when I'm loud and when I'm quiet. Who lets me act a plum fool and gives me the space I need to be me.

I find myself evaluating relationships and circumstances that I come across during this spiritual journey. I evaluate them NOW because I can't have anything in my life that will cause me to become someone I'm not. I will not entertain conversations that will require me to lie about who and what I am. I just don't want something coming in my life that's going to disrupt my peace to the point I don't know who I am or why I'm doing what I'm doing. I want to always be aware and awake spiritually so I can identify what and why something is happening in my life. I want to be able to identify the lesson I'm supposed to learn and how will I be able to help others through my learned lesson. Just recently I had to tell my best friend that I would rather be her friend than her business partner because I didn't like the way I responded to her when we had to have THOSE CONVERSATIONS. Her friendship meant more to me than any job could ever mean. Me voicing my truth helped her see that we were headed in the wrong direction if we were going to be successful in this venture together something had to change. We talked about what we needed from each other and vowed to honor those wishes respectfully. I will not compromise my integrity nor my peace for the sake of anyone else's pain and neither should you. How do you know when your soul is speaking out for your VALUE? 1. When your voice has become silent. - know that your voice matters and you have the right to be an advocate for your soul. 2. When someone says something to you that goes against everything you believe in - do not compromise your beliefs just because someone disagrees with you and the way you do what you do. 3. When you feel you've outgrown a group of people or a situation. - You have to know when you're being called to a higher standard. When the pull to move on has come.... move! Value everything you learned during that season and use it to help someone else. 4. When you feel the weight being lifted and the burdens are no longer holding you down. - You're walking in the right direction my friend when you can stand solidly in your decisions. It's your peace you're after not anyone else's. "Remember a Center Soul is a Center Mind" Find Peace Within Be blessed,

Ms. Lisa D.

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